Everyone Needs Someone Like Andy King In Their Life

I’ve now watched both Fyre Fest documentaries and, as much as it pains me to admit, I enjoyed the Netflix one more. Because of their partnership with the FuckJerry scumbags they had access to lots more footage and they had a lot more interviews with Fyre employees. The Hulu one was good too and focused more on Billy, while the Netflix one was more about the disaster that was the festival. I also thought it was pretty fucked up how the Hulu one almost entirely ignored the impact that this had on the people of the Bahamas, but Netflix did a good job of addressing that too.

But that’s not what this blog is about. This blog is about the legend Andy King. If you haven’t seen it he was more or less Billy’s fixer. Whenever Billy would fuck up he’d cry and call Andy and Andy would come to his rescue. Typically it was about logistical things like catering but, as you’ve seen if you watched the video above, there was one occasion where it went wayyyyyyy beyond that and Billy asked Andy to go suck some guy’s dick.

Ignoring what an outrageous and offensive request that is, I gotta give it up for my man Andy being a down to ride and just being like, “Ok well I guess I gotta go suck some dick now.” Dude warred right up and simply said ok send me the dude’s address and I’ll get right over there. He wasn’t about to give a bad blowjob either, he brushed his teeth and used some mouthwash and showered and everything. Andy got ready to go blow the Bahamian head of customs like he was getting ready for a black tie gala. No half measures with him. You ask Andy to give some head and he’s gonna go all Heather Brooke on it, get that water back and make Cunningham fall in love.

If you don’t have a down to ride like that in your crew, and I don’t, then I feel bad for you. This is pure, unadulterated friendship and dedication. If you’ve got a guy like Andy by your side then you can take over the world, or, alternatively, scam thousands of people out of their hard earned money.